Self-Defeating Belief #2: I have to… 🤔

Jodie Eckleberry-Hunt, Ph.D., A.B.P.P.

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Jul 23, 2024

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The main problem with “I have to” is that it leads to feeling victimized. Yes, there are things that we all have to do — like paying taxes and bills. 💰 We could also view tending to financial obligations as choosing not to go to jail or losing our homes, but I’m not talking about survival obligations.

I am referring to the daily ways in which we guilt ourselves into doing things we don’t want to do because we don’t feel like we have a choice. I am also referencing the ways in which we react without considering choice at all. Many of us have been so brainwashed into jumping into action that we stopped questioning a long time ago. 🗯

I am suggesting there is a price tag associated with every “I have to” because it is one more thing that takes you away from “I want to.” At the very least, we can be honest with ourselves about the cost and the potential choice. 💲

Give yourself permission to not have the answers to every problem dropped on your lap. Give yourself permission to make an alternative choice (guilt free). If you want to take something on, perhaps you reframe it as, “I choose to,” which can help with a sense of control.

Next time: Tap the brake before the “I have to” autopilot kicks in. 🚗