My Biggest Lessons about 2020
2020 has been personally heartbreaking, and it isn’t a direct result of Covid-19. I have not had Covid-19; I have not lost any loved ones to the deadly virus; and I have not lost my job. In that light, I have been incredibly fortunate.
My heartbreak around 2020 comes from a dawning realization that the world I believed to exist either does not exist or no longer exists. I feel as if my eyes have been opened to some very harsh realities of human existence and behavior.
In my disbelief, I have wondered if my experience is part of aging or if the world has truly changed. Regardless, it has been enormously painful.
The most disturbing experience of 2020 for me has been seeing the way in which humans have turned upon one another — so easily. It is seeing how easily societal forces have turned us against one another so that we see each other as mortal enemies. We are not able to agree on previously held truths. We are not able to see one another as community members with shared goals of surviving and thriving. We are not able to extend mutual respect to one another.
Selfishness, greed, dishonesty, and self-interest are seemingly pervasive. I have been particularly discouraged and dejected by the attacks on science. It was not until I saw the HBO series on Chernobyl that I realized this was nothing new. Even in the face of a nuclear meltdown, humanity has argued what is scientific truth. Science, along with truth, can be discarded when inconvenient to self-serving purposes.
Though I would like to say that I have handled the revelations of 2020 with grace, I have not. There have been times I felt rage, demoralization, grief, and hopelessness. To hang onto my sanity, I have sought deeper understanding and meaning.
To that end, I recognize the powerful, powerful role of fear in altering perceptions of reality and driving human behavior. If I can remain focused on fear, I am able to muster a sense of empathy, which has been sorely missing in 2020.
So, my biggest lessons of 2020 aren’t about safety. They aren’t about politics. They aren’t about coping skills, stress reduction, or mindfulness. I share them with you because I am afraid. I am scared that if we aren’t all paying attention to these lessons, we are doomed.
Lessons about 2020:
· We need one another to survive.
· Differences enable survival.
· If we do not care about the least among us, our survival is doomed.
· Fear is the biggest threat to our survival.
In order to survive as a species, we need people with different perspectives, backgrounds, skills, talents. This ensures that we are able to battle all the threats we will encounter. We need the cautious, the adventurous, the brave, the fearful, the hopeful, the entrepreneurial, the science-guided, and the spiritually-guided. The more differences we have covered the more likely we are to survive. This is evolution 101.
United States history is steeped in rugged individualism — the notion that we need to take care of ourselves, but this has taken on a life of its own to the detriment of community interdependence. In order to survive as a species, we need one another. We are less likely to survive if we are alone because we cannot possibly manage all of the threats we will face. Rugged individualism on steroids (which is where we presently are as a society) becomes narcissism. This ‘all about me’ attitude that will eventually lead to our downfall.
The mindset of everyone having the liberty to do what they want during Covid-19 hasn’t worked so well. In an interdependent society, we cannot do whatever we want without resultant chaos. Chaos will also eventually lead to our downfall — leading to the next point.
When we do not care about the least among us, we are doomed. The idea that each and every person has an equal chance of survival is a damned lie. We each have talents and vulnerabilities that are meant to be used together. We are not JUST responsible for ourselves. We are responsible for the collective good. When the least among us fails, it is a sign that we are all failing. The lack of compassion or care for fellow humanity should be incredibly disturbing to all.
I do believe that fear is behind the drive for self-centered behavior, but that does not excuse it. We are all accountable for looking in the mirror and asking what is our part, and how can we do more. We are accountable for facing down the fear and demonstrating courage, and perhaps it is the courage to rise above the drive for self-preservation that supersedes all else.
Fear will continue to exist. We must recognize that fear skews our perceptions. Fear distorts reality. Fear drives us to see our neighbors as enemies when, in fact, fear is the enemy. Our responsibility is to see it and refuse to allow it to be in charge.
2020 has taught me a great deal, and I am lucky that I have basic needs met so that I can reflect on what I have seen. While I may at times wish the lessons of 2020 away, I am also grateful to see them so that I can act upon them. Until we are able to have an open discussion about issues that lurk below the surface, I don’t know how we will ever tackle them, and it will take every last one of us.
No matter what angle you come from in your life view, those who say we don’t need one another are part of the problem. We do need one another. We are interdependent. We cannot afford to leave anyone behind, and the mindset behind the idea that other people are dispensable is the problem.
My hope in sharing these lessons with you is to give you an opportunity to reflect, as I have, on what part we all play in turning this ship around.
