Connecting the Dots
When I was a kid, I loved to play with my Lite Brite. For those of you who are too young to understand, Lite Brite was a big plastic box with a screen full of peg holes. There was a light bulb behind the screen. You would plug in the box and put a design page onto the screen. Then, you would insert colored pegs into the design to make the images light up.
I assure you that this was high tech in the 1970’s, and I was lucky to have my own.
I’ve been thinking how life is like Lite Brite or even a dot-to-dot puzzle.
When we start life, our design sheet is pretty empty, but with each big life experience we place a dot onto our life design page. We may wish we hadn’t had some experiences, but dots got added regardless. We may have had experiences that made no sense at the time. More dots. There were even experiences that we don’t remember. Dots.
As life goes on, our design page is filling with dots, and it can be hard to see how they are related. The bigger picture may be indecipherable. It can all just seem like a big mess. We probably aren’t even aware that we have been adding dots or that a bigger picture exists.
Then, whammo! We hit our fourth decade, and we start to connect some of the dots. Before long, we get the sense of a bigger picture. If we continue to reflect, the design starts to fall into place, and we can actually see the Lite Brite (or dot-to-dot) image take shape.
We begin to make connections. We begin to understand ourselves, our lives, our motivations, where we have been, and where we want to go next.
Life is so complex, and life is so simple. We get way too caught up in beating ourselves up about the past. We drown in self-judgment. We wish mistakes away. In the end, those experiences are crucial to building the bigger picture. All of those experiences created connections in the design. Just because we don’t see it at the time doesn’t mean it is any less crucial. It is the negativity — the self-flagellation — the shame — the pride — that prevents all of us from seeing what lies just beyond our noses. We are blinded by self-pity, self-doubt, and self-defeat.
Years have to pass before we are able to see the design or even understand that it is being created. Youth is about being in the moment and experiencing the moment. Maturity is about self-awareness, understanding, and choice. Wisdom is about accepting all of this as necessary and useful and listening to the greater meaning in our lives.
As we speak, we are adding dots to our design. Rather than criticizing them, how about asking how they add to the big picture? How about looking for connections and understanding?
Most importantly, as we start to connect the dots, what meaning does it bring to our lives? What it is telling us? What is our grand design, and what will we do with it?
Life seems to start simple. Then, we make it all fucked up and hard. Later, it gets simple again. Do good in your own life, and be a net positive in the lives of others. Listen. Learn. Connect your dots. Realize that your dots are connected to his dots, which are connected to her dots, which are connected to her dots, which are connected to ….
